my dad told me i had to spend my money wisely..so i spent the money he gave me for a desk chair on weed. ill be so high i wont even notice its gone
oral is when you put your mouth on someones privates and play moterboat or popsicle
What. The. Fuck. No, you will not spank me.
That wasn't intended for you, my bad.
The only way I could have failed my exam worse is if there would have been a drug test portion
I passed out on my porch last night. I'm still making it to class. This is what growing up means.
i put his shirt in a ziplock bag to preserve his smell
please tell me you are kidding me
I tried to talk to him, but he didn't recognize me at first. I had to show him the top of my head and then he remembered.
I just want a whole pitcher of margarita and a headdress from party city and sit around and look like a fucking indian princess.
Maybe one day we'll get unicorn butt tattoos together
Much like Dre, I was forgotten about.
You guys wanna start around 10:30 tomorrow?
We can start at 5am for all I care. You ask like I have plans.
Let's be honest, I am pretty sketchy looking.
Banged a guy with 2 broken arms once. Top that
Wine through a straw in a subway cup.....classy
Im about to get an ultrasound of my balls. I hate waiting. Its the worst.
Randomize
