I was hooking up with him in my car, he wouldn't stop with my nipples, I had to literally beat him off of me. He kept groaning too while he was doing it. Sick.
Mommy issues
I mean, it really isn't YOUR car until you have sex in it.
my mom hid the smirnoff from me. this is the most fucked up game of hide and seek EVER
He showed me a four inch blond hair that grows out of his side. He calls it his little ray of sunshine. Please come get me.
It was one time. Now I have to constantly remind her my name is Jessica not Jizzica.
i think i have that disease where you wake up in strange places drunk.
I think I have internal bruising from those poses we were doing last night. My own ribs hurt me. I don't understand.
That's science, my friend. Boner science.
I tackled a mailbox like a linebacker. He almost broke his hip and his friend lit a bottle rocket off inside of the car. Yes it was a successful night.
Sweet. I'm actually coaching my work study into a 4-girl orgy so dinner was kinda important. Yes, I'm the best boss ever.
The maintenance guy asked for a box to stand on to reach the ceiling. All I could offer him was a keg.
Yes... I'll kill two birds with one crazy ecstacy filled night.
I'm topless, wearing a fur coat, stink of sex, and eating dim sum. 2015 is off to a great start.
Drunk on wine at my parents house watching "RugRats In Paris". Comeatmeadulthood.
I NEED HELP. IM TRIPPIN BAWLS IN THE BACK OF MY MOMS CAR.
Randomize
