Hahahhahaha! Oooh get it! Ugh I am so dead but if I go to the lib whuich I will hopefully b havung sex instead, ill hit u up
More dangerous that a broken heart and a shotgun.
Yeah I'm pretty much like lane on gilmore girls except my mom doesn't look so mean all the time.
Billy Mays is dead too!
Somewhat annoying American icons better be watching their backs
Two girls are doing the worm relatively well on the bar floor after the fact I just saw one puke in the trash
Waiting outside the STD clinic 30 min before it opens already in a line up. It's like were all waiting for a concert that no ones really pumped for
Sadness tears and throw up everywhere
"Home for the holidays" isn't clearance to fuck the recently 18 year old high schooler right?
Nope, his last birthday was.
Every pair of shorts I try on makes me look like some kind of powerful lesbian wizard.
That is like, the point of shorts
I've started day drinking because fuck everyone else
Hooked up with a straight guy while dressed as a man. I'm unstoppable.
Let's knock shit down like godzilla and have intense sex in the rubble
I'm high. ignore me
I just ordered $70 worth of pizza and I'm not even ashamed. Happy Valentine's Day to me.
So basically I really like drugs AND banging cops and it's starting to get complicated
He ate me out on the front lawn of the post office. The people in the office across the road definitely got a show!
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