I have to decide between the hot young blond with no apparent gag reflex, and the brunette with a great ass and a trust fund.
I feel odd... a had sex with a chick and she keept her socks on...
dude sorry about putting my finger in your butt last nite i was wasted and thought it was mine
all i seem to do anymore is lay around stoned, naked and eating mangoes
We pinky-swore to never fuck each other again.
Unless you can cure my hangover with your penis I'm not interested.
I just had cybersex with some guy from the Netherlands for 2 HOURS instead of doing my History project...how's your break going?
Yeah thats cool. We can play the alphabet game while doing bumps of coke in the back of his volswagon
I just haven't been myself lately. I slept with a guy 21 years older than me and I've been wearing my hair in a center part.
I might have been the first person to be rolling balls at a referee seminar
She just causally held my limp dick in her hand the entire movie. Her parents were cuddling on the couch too..that brave!
Definitely just realized I wore a shirt that says "building leaders for Christ" to a hookup. Roll tide.
I left my panties in the microwave for too long and they caught on fire
Also I think I drunkenly signed up to be an uber driver or something because they keep emailing me to fill out a background check
Truth be told it's significantly easier to get over someone when they file a police report on you
Randomize
