The mall is playing a fucking country mix of lady marmalade.
welcome to maine.
You love popeyes more than me
does delicious chicken come out of your vagina?
If i'm not hungover, near death, and wondering what i did the night before on Monday, life is not worth living.
Next guy we share better have a little more dignity than that
we used the bottom of a tampon for coke since no one had a 20 on them. My life has resisted to this.
You kept me hostage in your driveway until you got your point across that alaska has warm weather
Dad just showed up on someone else's golf cart, filled an ice chest with booze and left while yelling "SHINANIGANS!!!!" this is going no where fast.
maybe these stereotypes wouldn't come up if you would stop taking body shots off another
You're on Grindr at the STD clinic. I love you.
We're having Wednesday-night goat-night at the bar.
It's hard to explain...
Just skate-of-shamed, shirtless, with a bucket or margaritas. Good luck beating that one.
I seriously want to say to him "Do you know how many blow jobs you could have gotten this summer?"
Who the fuck gets injured on a merry-go-round? HOW IS IT POSSIBLE??
I'm pretty sure I went in the girls bathroom and vomited everywhere then looked for a urinal for like 20 minutes
He passed away peacefully doing what he loved to do best. Eating a pound of vodka gummy worms and failing at sex and the city trivia.
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