I just added her as a friend on Facebook. I met her 5 minutes ago and there are already more than 50 pics of me uploaded... from other nights.
He really likes Obama...and Bill Clinton too. He said "I mean, how many presidents can say that they got head in the oval office?"
Soulmates.
Had a speaker in class today. She asked whats the first question when you see someone pregnant. I said whos the father? She was looking for "is it a boy or a girl?"
He just yelled in the bar, "So I stuck it in two girls butts, why are you bringing that up now?"
I have no valid justification for peeing in your kitchen, but I don't think it's worth breaking up over.
I think the threesome was inevitable when she walked out in nothing but his boxers followed by him completely naked.
Just the amount of girls he locked himself in my room woth says your gonna have to take a cab bro. I don't think he's going anywhere
How am I feeling this morning? Well, besides the fact that my vagina looks like a pair of giraffe's lips and I'm walking like an over-confident cowgirl, I'm fantastic. Thanks for your concern.
Sorry, I was unaware dragging you upstairs for sex was such an awful thing.
I feel my soul being ripped out of my eye sockets
Do you miss the park or do you miss us having sex in public?
Wake your sexy ass up. It's donut time.
My mom just said we can't get married in nude body suits to look like earthworms. She's ruining my life.
U were so upset when the shower ruined ur nachos. I didn't kno what to do.
Like if I exploded right now there would be cum and fajitas everywhere.
Randomize