if you could put a roof over IU campus it would be the biggest whorehouse in the nation
The mexican place next the the funeral home has dollar margaritas, our grandfather would want us to act on this... trust me i know.
I forgot how few teeth there are in this state...
The dopest dose you'll ever dose. I felt like an octopus all of thursday
Yea dude. I'm gonna be the life of the party. THIS BITCH GETS DRUNK BY HERSELF
According to you, you were with your "Eskimo bro for life" last night.
Want to do me the honour of waxing my legs again before I go to Mexico? I feel like it's a tradition we shouldn't break.
In hindsight, drunkenly yelling "I'M TICKLISH" might not have been an entirely wise decision
Btw when I was saying "fuck you" I meant it like "be quiet beautiful princess"
We poured all the Fireball on the Slip and Slide and long story short I have two black eyes.
I feel like my foot is being amputated. Or maybe it's the vodka. I couldn't tell you.
I mean it's up to you where you want to sleep but I'm telling you you're going to hear us have sex no matter what room you're in.
Fair enough
is it still the walk of shame if his dad gave me a 'thanks for sleeping with my son' head nod on my way out this morning?
She has a girlfriend too.. we decided that two cheats equal eachother out to zero. with our flawed grasp on algebra and the bottle of jack we were passing back and forth the logic seemed airtight.
Standing naked in my kitchen making nachos. I love my youth.
Randomize
