At Wal-Mart last night I watched two guys scramble for $4.34 to pay for a pack of ping pong balls and red solo cups. They had to put the .34 on a credit card. Winter break begins!
i have a picture in my phone of you with a bottle of tequila in your back pocket. i believe you were saying "pocket of champions" or something along those lines
I feel eeeverything like there's a rhythm and everything can be felt w/o ever touching it. And it's beautiful. Sunshine or raindrops it's like orgasming. Everything has a taste.
all i wanted was to be slutty. now i'm meeting him for drinks tomorrow because he woke up before i had a chance to sneak out and was too polite to say no
I'll just dance on top of the ping pong table, and if it's stable enough for that, then it's stable enough for sex
He really thought ahead and just left the tequila in the mail box for late night pickup. Best. Friend. Ever.
The worst part about getting "creative" and by that i mean baked is that i just wanna get laid right now and all im doing is eating nachos
I just went into a strangers house to have a spoonful of sugar to cure my hiccups, wtf is wrong with me
I think my boss gives me work off weekends because he doesn't want me showing up hungover anymore..
I'm warming McDonald's pies on my heater cause I'm too high for the microwave.
I think we ended 5-7 relationships as well this weekend...so another good stat
He said that he had extra crunchy taquitos and wanted to go down on me.. I mean how could I say no?
Russell is lonely. He needs a companion.
You're lucky you have a monster cock or most people may just laugh at your penis' nickname.
Somehow, you looked so classy chugging that bottle of wine last night.
Next time we do shrooms i am finding an open field at sunrise and running through it and nobody is stopping me this time!
Randomize
