she took her clothes off and my dick went from =====> to =>
so basically i'm the" little sister", he's the "big brother" and we just fucked
she was so "full of love" from watching twilight that she came over and gave me a handjob. when does the next movie come out?
Before he took off his pants he paused and said, "Remember..sometimes great things come in small packages."
It looks alright. The blow up doll is in the microwave, and she has forks in her ass
There's just something about sucking a flaccid dick that makes me feel so calm. Like a baby cow..
They better compete for your attention. Dual to the fuck
It must have been an amazing night, I have "my pants are responsible people" written on my pants in permanent marker.
I fucked my cousin and caught chlamydia this year. I can't really harbour any illusions about myself anymore.
Thank god for federal credentials. Waaaaayyyy to hungover to go through airport security lines right now.
Because everytime she talks to you she goes in her room and plays Come Sail Away on repeat. Can't take this shit anymore Jake
The last thing I remember about last night was guzzling white zinfandel out of the box and eating cheese. And I was thinking OH YOU FANCY HUHHH
he just cleaned his wound with pinnacle whipped
THERE HAS BEEN GRANDTHEFT IN THE HOUSE. SOMEONE STOLE THE BABYWIPES AND YOU NEED TO BUY MORE BEFORE WE LET YOU IN. oh and you have to take two shots before we'll let you in. with no chaser.
I woke up with a pube in my teeth...I'm disturbed cause we're both clean shaven
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