i cant believe u jumped in someones trunk just to get out of talking to me
just had a dream there were parent teacher conferences in college...scariest dream ever.
this is not okay. even my mom refers to me as a sorostitute.
It's like you are the superhero of getting jizzed on
You told me to pour the Gatorade on you "like Flashdance"
my taxi driver is listening to 50 shades of grey audiobook. this is uncomfortable.
Can I please come dance in my bra to destiny's child with you? I'll bring the wine and the glitter
I don't see how you can turn down creme brulee and orgasms
It's a sad day when you can't take off your pants and drink a margarita at work.
Like we just had a bunch of sex and then he threaded my eyebrows in bed lol. It was amazing
you'll probably come home to me baked as fuck and shirtless
Just leave a note saying "riding dick see you in the mornig"
hahahaha classic. this is why you are going to a college with a hospital right next to it
Also either i just launched into space as a rocket or my legs just orgasmed, but i am high as a soul train
Yeaaaaa...im super disgusted with myself lol...which is interesting, considering all of the things I have done in my life...
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