Do vagina's smell?
she had the hairiest bush ive ever seen. it looked like a spoiled head of lettuce.
Its where this guy sticks a jar up his ass. Be prepared to be suspended between vomiting and cheering.
He asked me If i had cheated on my boyfriend when I said no he said it's like he doesnt know me anymore
I keep waking up with the nagging feeling I gave him half a hand job through his shorts.
And my cat won't make me food. She's a bitch
Apparently she saw two women get in a slapping match over a comforter at target yesterday. She said it was awesome. Clearly I take after her.
Can I tell him I got herpes from your bong instead of from that guy who claimed to be an olympic diver?
Nothing quite says Coachella like me doing high yoga in the middle of a field by myself
i officially have over $300 in my bank account. that's a year's worth of chipotle.
Aside from the possibility of pregnancy, I'm going to call last night a raging success.
I jammed my finger giving him a hand job. Don't ask how, I'm still trying to figure that out.
In local news "Man Stabbed With Golf Club" next person who tells me this is a safe place to live gets punched...
Whatever. I'll take my new fine ass dick sucking nails elsewhere.
The work outs are working. Someone just said my body type was “Tits On A Stick”.
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