Until that no good dick sucking whore stays away from my boyfriend I am gonna start blowing all of his friends...
at least 'blackout me' had enough sense to take the puke covered duvet off the comforter.
Totally just grabbed the wrong dick. Damn this tequila.
I just sniffled when I woke up and got a bump of coke. I have never felt so good hung over.
She won't let me open the car door while we are on the highway so I can throw up outside. She deserves to have her car thrown up in.
still using moms red Christmas cookie plate she sent to cut lines on. not sure I can return with a clear conscious
You're fine
I'm hiding in my chest because my walls smell weird. I'm not fine.
How do I tell my Dad that in the picture he has of me and my brother as the background of his phone we were both rolling face on ecstasy?
The bartender asked if I wanted a to-go cup for my crown and coke.....I just realized I'm back in Montana and fuck did I miss home.
have i crossed some slutty boundary when gay guys are sending me cock pics?
I just totok an inventory of my purse: 1 apple, 1 pair of underwear, 7 condoms, $18 in ones, a check with "for sexual healing" in the subject line, and a 4 oz bottle of wine.
Oh! and a letter from a judge saying I got an interview. Cause that balances it out.
I have discovered my latent superpower. If a friend is dating a bi chick they will inevitably try and talk me into a threesome.
It turns out my English teacher used to pose for Playboy. She's an inspiration.
First post college job and I got fired within a week. Something tells me that adulthood isn't going to be as much fun as sex and the city led me to believe.
I've got two reasons for you to come over later and one of them is pierced.
Randomize
