just smash crush and snort whatever we can get our paws on
I knew I fell for you for a reason
Is there a nice way of saying 'touch my penis or i dont really wanna hangout"?
she told me i tasted like america
my dad just told me he wants a furry wall in the house... i'm proud and concerned
cashier rang me up and said, "white people are funny." like i'm NOT the only white person to buy just lettuce & 40 glow sticks
Note to self: semen does not count as food to take medicine with
and it seems i've caught your masturbating bug. thanks.
At 27 it's no longer called 'slutty', it's called having a healthy sex life...
Anyhow, I am sorry for being obnoxious about wanting more sex and forcing you to eat lunchmeat off of my ginormous nipples. I knew that you weren't going to succumb to my pushy demands
Itd be nice if there was a level of interest in me somewhere in between the indifference and obsession that I've only been attracting
she stole my Timberlands and my Sublime shirt and left her heels and bra. this is war
I was proudly and successfully the first girl ever to get kicked out of a the bar for being too drunk last night. Loving spring break.
Can we just talk about the fact that the last time I got laid I was wearing a Jurassic Park tshirt?
answer honestly do you think i can make a bloody mary with ketchup????
is it sad that the highlight of my saturday night was waiting till 3 in the morning to hear about your saturday night?
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