i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
He was sucking on my finger.... and it was at that moment that I thought: Man. I wish I had a penis.
Midget Michael Jackson impersonator dancing to Beat it in Penn Station almost caused me to miss my train. God, I
Not gonna happen. She just told me she puts glitter over the mole on her nose to make it look like a piercing.
I feel like vodka or no vodka, you'd still be trying to button your cat into your comforter
those 9 inches of man changed my life forever.
The ice cream man just told me to use protection.
I wish they'd wear their tampons on the outside. At least gimme some warning
I think my uterus is still laying in your bed somewhere under the covers.
It's still to early in our relationship to tell her I was sleeping in my car
He asked me to hum the Ghost Busters theme song as I was going down on him
His and hers buttplugs were a resounding success. Tru luv
30-degree weather + Metal Cockring Monday = really hard to pee.
I'm 22 and I'm drinking hawaiian punch from a sippy cup. Everything is right in the world.
My roommate just woke up to me masturbating in our room. I figured this would happen eventually.
Randomize
