he asked me if i had ever jacked off high and then referred to it as a "man-to-man question"
do you think women who transgender themselves have the option of getting a circumcised or an uncircumcised dick?
I just want a better ending for myself. Not walking around with one sock on and my bush hanging out.
one of the cashiers from Kroger is eating at my kitchen table and nobody knows why.
I think being an adult is being able to say no to free shots...I need to work on that.
Every time you started making out for him we all cheered for you... that's what sorority sisters do - they cheer you on when you make bad life decisions at the bar.
I just got my beard fondled by a drunk chick outside the venue. I feel slightly violated. And I think her boyfriend wanted to fight me.
Just had a guy try to pull the maraca out of my shirt with his teeth... Wtf
Meh, all I have to do tomorrow is proctor an AP test. No loud noises and no physical activity allowed for almost 4 hours. Sounds like the perfect recovery period for a hangover.
well whats the tarot card for I'm totes going to be schlobbing his cob? because that's in his future.
He went down on me for an hour and a half. He needs to get promoted more often.
I can't believe I'm coordinating a threesome at work. My productivity is at an all time low.
And you will die and be carried in a backpack before I allow you not to comply in this tomfoolery.
Dude there's ten thousand dollars worth of damage to the kids house and three thousand in stolen property and his dog is missing he is pissed
If I give him back his dog do you think he'll invite me to the next party
Sorry didnt text you yesterday. had to put restraining order on my ex.
Randomize
