she was mega hot - except for the poop under her fingernails
this is like her 8th guy since december, is she wasn't frumpy people would call her a whore
this morning i woke up with my panties on and i knew where i was. success.
it's like there's an entire ecosystem in your vagina.
at a bar and heard one girl tell another her tampon string was showing she goes i dont want it in anymore anyways. then proceeds to pull out her tampon in the middle of the bar and leave it on a plate. ewwww
He fell and asked for a beer and a band-aid.
HE GOT FOURTEEN STICHES
the only good thing about him lasting five minutes was that nobody thinks i had sex with him or that im a slut because we were only in the bathroom for five minutes
He said his penis was a 1 woman penis with a conscience an I was that woman...technically a declaration of commitment rite?
I'm on a mission. But just to make out with him so his relationship collapses and he is single when I come back in April.
Red flag bro. Her only friends are barflys and a teen with a fake ID
I'm playing drinking games with a boy who looks like Liam Hemsworth. I think I'm fine.
So i walked around campus drunk and alone last night eating pizza and a lunchable from 7-11. Sat by the flag pole and drank an entire liter of water, took off my shoes to prance around in the fountain, then stepped in dog shit on the way home...barefoot.
My moral compass cannot be waived by two measly bloody Mary's
His penis is the only thing worth pursuing but all the baggage attached isn't.
she was just meowing in the corner eating frozen chicken nuggets
Randomize
