I just found out she jerks off to lesbian porn too honest to god
you wouldn't believe how perfect a match this is its scary
I mean i stumbled out of the club yelling at random people" I"M GOING TO TEACH YOUR KIDS SOMEDAY!!"
And thats what homeschooling is for
anyone who has a picture of a ferrari with the caption "mAh DreAM caR" is getting denied as my facebook friend.
shes on the floor puking and texting simultaneously.
There is literally a guy in my class with a gallon of water and a trophy.
I just couldn't load the family groceries on to the same seat where I had sex 12 hours ago.
I think I just cured my dogs munchies
Nothing says "I Love you" like my dick in a pizza box
This summer has already been like the best summer ever. FREEDOM IS AWESOME. GOD BLESS AMERICA AND GOD BLESS THE SINGLE LIFE.
I'm high and having a granola buffet this has got to be the healthiest I have ever been
I asked him to change the channel. There was no way I could do reverse cowgirl with golf on.
he can suck his own dick, i cant compete with that
Yesterday I went home with one shoe, today I go home with three. Fucking win.
That awkward moment when you bring a guy back to your place then have to tell him you only have magnums.
I’m not washing my pussy with handsoap.
Randomize
