: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
so chris just stuck his hand between rachel's legs and yelled 'TROUT!' and we were like...you're wasted
my life trainwreck boards at 9:30
had to split buying plan b over two cards. I will no longer challenge people to get on my level
My gynecologist inadvertently complimented your penis.
I can't break up with him, I ran the math. Taking into account his 7 inch penis and the standard deviation from average, almost 90% of guys should have a smaller penis than he does.
Really? Penis math? This is why guys shouldn't date female engineers.
I'm pretty sure I told everyone in the bar I hadn't had sex in five months. And then I offered everyone calamari.
We hotboxed his closet and accidentally lit some of his shirts on fire... do we have a fire extinguisher?
Only my second night back in town and I already have drunk middle aged women doing the robot around me in a circle.
Im just confused who has their mom break up with someone
So it turns out "let's pretend to be gay so guys will stop hitting on us" was step one in her plan to get me into bed...
I worked all year for this tax return. I deserve to get my nipples pierced.
after sex he fell asleep with his water bottle in one hand and his dick in the other at 6pm. I'm a winner.
My mom is coming to visit today & it's giving me anxiety. I feel like she can see through me & into the whore I've become.
You kept calling yourself a spider monkey... Then ran to the bathroom to "prepare for the main event"
Randomize
