I miss vodka workout Fridays
WHY AREWNT YOU HERE SO MUCH FUN STUFF DO IT GET IN CAR NOW caps lock
sooo... you have no idea who nailed their tubesocks to my wall?
so far we have 6 big wheels and 10 boxes of wine for the tour de franzia. team drunkslut is favored to win the yellow jersey.
I have pictures of you taking tequila shots off the front of the police car when the cop wasn't looking.
After i finished him. He goes "youre a champion"... Then whispers "forever"
i'm pretty sure i can feel a baby kicking just looking at him. if he didnt impregnate you, you officially have an iron-clad uterus.
Everyone else in class agrees the weed smell is coming from me
STOP WHATEVER YOU ARE DOING AND GO OUTSIDE RIGHT NOW. THE MOON LOOKS LIKE CATWOMAN
Dude, you can't drink while watching Star Trek. You hardly understand it sober.
It's an alien shaped cup though. i think that'll help me absorb.
Goodnight Shia. Goodnight Moon.
I can't wait to shower all this regret off of me
I just had to explain to my grandma what a reach-around is. Too far..
I'm in the Sheetz parking lot waiting for dad to finish a drug deal.
Omfg 7 hour sex session who am I?
PS: I think I'm in love
Ability to walk tomorrow tbd
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