So I just watched the Lakers/Magic game so I could have something to talk about with him after we have sex this time
that was a gay-test. you passed.
with flying rainbow colors i hope!
She was so drunk that I kept trying to switch out her wine for water. Sort of like Jesus, but in reverse.
Sorry if I ruined your sex last night with my constant text updates about the plot of Bolt.
i feel like a lion cub that has been breast fed for years, and mom has left, and now i have to learn how to hunt on my own
i need to break up with him. i realized this while i was making a mental grocery list while we were having sex. this is not the first time i've done that.
We FINALLY fucked. I swear that's the longest I've ever held out for
Umm you met him three days ago....
I said what I said
this morning your mother said to me "sorry to have to meet you like this, in my sons bed" later she said "you never know whos gonna be in there. its scary sometimes"
the boat had a sign not to jump off the roof of it, which gave us the idea to jump off the roof of it
He kept pouting and saying i cockblocked him and I kept yelling "I'm sorry...but the cock was never out to be blocked"
Tonights drinking will be celebratory and victorious. Picture the end of The Mighty Ducks set to beer.
You lifted he top layer off his birthday cake and made it say 'eat me' in the cookie monster voice so yeah he knew.
a pizza costume came into my possession last night. needless to say i showed up to his house wearing only the pizza, shouting "delivery" into his window.
I wish I had a tail.
Why?
...why not?
Well when you come back we can have a huge bitch fit...or get really drunk....whichever comes first
Randomize