I mean I can't believe yesterday ended w/ your house getting firebombed. What an unexpected turn of events
I know they r crazy. However porn on a big screen is an easy commitment. They come with mute, stop, fast fwd and replay buttons. if only all women came that way...
my door was closed and her door was closed but even over the r.kelly playing at full blast i was able to hear her say "THAT'S NOT THE RIGHT HOLE!". Def rethinking my roommate situation.
So after i got done, she went over and got out her gecko, I felt like I was in an X rated geiko commercial.
As im putting my laundry in the machine, i find a solo cup and a pong ball that i signed babe ruth
Omg having my Grindr go off at the planned parenthood is just not okay
I just realized that I have to choose between a future orthopedic surgeon and a dude currently in jail. My life is so fucked.
But is that really the name you want to scream out during climax?
My therapist keeps stopping to ask what 'hooking up' means
ITS ORAL SEX CAROL
I was telling everyone at the frat that they had to try the "fantastic refreshment" that was everclear, vodka and country time
An d I'd rather cry while putting a waffle in my mouth than cry on my pillow, ya feel me?
Hey guys so who is Justin McGoo and why did I text him "fuck yooooouuu juuuustiiin mcgooo" at 12:06am on Thursday night?
You woke up in between the boxspring and the matress in a random dorm room.
He screamed, "Let there be light!" when he came
Lately I've been very attracted to Kevin Jonas because he's like...less hot than Joe, but he's this healthy mix of both Joe and Nick. It looks like he's finally growing into himself.
Randomize
