Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
i dont think my boyfriend knows how much of a pain it is to shave my ass
BLOW JOB GIRL IS IN WALMART
Some people actually refer to her as Kaitlyn you know.
I almost got runover on the sidewalk by a car but wen it got closer it was a crackhead walking with the whole front of a car... bumper, lights and all... I love New York.
I just want you to know I tipped the cab driver $10 last night because I felt bad that he didn't have healthcare.
While in Europe, he bought me a pouring tap to put on my liquor so I don't spill. This means 2 things.1) He really loves me. 2) I'm a noticeable alcoholic.
I can't make Walk of Shame Wednesdays a recurring theme.
your drunk mistake has arrived...he is the one wearing a poncho
We're smoking a joint the size of the average penis right now. I may not survive.
I think that girl got really offended when I made out with baby Jesus.
she just stared at nothing and then looked at me and goes, "that's a weird place to put the wall"
We hit a deer while we were singing an acapella version of "I will always love you"
It doesn't feel like real life when you open your hotel room door and the first person you see is wearing a rabbit costume. I'm too hungover for this.
Why am I sticky / covered in baby Tylonel?
And ANOTHER guy that I once got naked is doing gay porn now. Wtf? Am I the audition?!
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