Tell me exactly where it said it wasn't a unisex bathroom.
There is something about listening to Patsy Cline while pooping that makes the experience so much better.
new low: my hungover self just mistook bacon grease for mashed potatoes. worst. mistake. ever.
i just went through and liked all 1,239 of her pictures instead of writing my english paper. don't tell her, i want her to be surprised
you definitely made a grilled cheese using your iron..
ya and it worked didnt it??
No, this time she was diabetic. I think I fucked her into diabetic shock.
DDing is such a bittersweet job, just got the entire history of this girls hookup career
I hope you don't have to start the day explaining to me how you failed to turn "Can I practice my belly dancing in your apartment" into all night sex.
I don't care if we have to swim home from the bar, Im not gonna sit home in the dark and read some fucking book
Omg.....I raised my camera to take a pic at this presentation, and I wanted to zoom in, so I swiped my phone to the left and up pops my dick pic from last night.
I can't bring myself to turn around to see if pple saw it.
All I know is....there's beer in my camera. How do I know? Because I can pick up my camera,shake it and HEAR, the beer in it
If 26 stitches didn't sober her up, nothing will.
You can't just leave with hair like that
But really- as the voice of your vagina I am BEGGING you to do it. If not for yourself than for your poor innocent puss
Nautical themed porn is also great bc someone usually wears a captains hat
Randomize
