can you wear a superman outfit if we ever have sex?
i was so high it looked like the chipmunks movements were coordinated to that lady gaga song
Apparently throwing up on your own cape is still a party foul
She just asked me if her C-section scar turned me on.
I say we get drunk before the exam tomorrow. At least then we have a valid excuse for failing.
We've been here 3 hours and the only 1 word answer she didn't give was the drink order. Don't think I'm getting laid tonight
Blackout strip poker. Now. Bring flashlights because we found that candles are dangerous with nudity.
Getting arrested together sounded so much more fun in theory.
Today's hangover is a "wear sunglasses while pooping in the dark" kind of day
I didn't want to walk to anymore parties because I found a cat. It was magical.
Well I didn't know she was a dominatrix...so I kind of just went with it
she kind of stumbled up and said "Bitches be needin' stiches." i thought i could convince her to break a bottle over someones head but she fell onto her face and passed out before i could say anything
Btw, you owe me. One (1) orgasm.
If by fun you mean, did I meet her cousin for the.first time and bang him, then yes it was a productive evening.
Remember that Czech tennis player I brought home from beer pong and banged on your couch last year? He just booty calle me. From the Czech Republic.
Randomize
