problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
I swear, you have an app for that. "Attention: your boyfriend is pooping. Place call?"
Sometimes when I see a shoe on the side of the road, I get a little depressed that I've never partied that hard.
she got into med school, i feel dumb for banging her dance major friend
This is the high leading the old right now
I think the closest to heaven you can get in this world is your morning dump after a night of Molly
I'll feed you vitamin c from my mouth this weekend. Like a baby bird.
Promise??
Drunk me made out with someone's girlfriend last night, was invited to their place for a semi-threesome, and then walked home at three am. Can't decide if this is better or worse than drunkenly challenging everyone to taekwondo sparring matches...
So our annual Dick Trip has been tentatively scheduled for the week of July 1 - 5. This years theme is "Fucking for Freedom".
If I ever look like I'm about to have a repeat of last night, hit me. Just smack me as hard as you can.
How is it??
I'm drinking Gatorade out of a champagne flute.
Morning! Im using your rent money to snort percocet.
I bet I give better head than any other PTA mom.
Pretty sure if we keep hanging out on Tuesdays there will be no whiskey left for the younger generations or the universe will implode....tomato tahmato
I’ve developed a strange interest in ear wax removal vids on YouTube. Dear god, I need to get a job
Randomize
