Adams eating in the shower, he says it's one of his favorite places to eat. Btw it's milanos he's eating, he says he loves italy too.
i said she could sleep in my bed and she goes "iiiiiiii warned you. iiiiim a cuddlerrrrrr!" slightly regretting this..
explain the broken jalepenos in my underwear drawer?
We broke into the space center. If i go to jail I wanted to tell you, you have a fantastic dick. Use it wisely.
We had fun with our Indiana Jones role-playing until I whipped myself in the dick with my belt.
I mean i can't really be mad...either way i was gonna fuck him or hate fuck him, so it's basically a win/win situation.
She wants me to spank her and yell "Kerry! Your father is disappointed with your choices!" Fuck up but crazy hot? Or just fuck up crazy?
We fucked through the entire Destiny's Child album, it was a beautiful thing.
I recommend we watch the Super Bowl together and have celebratory sex if we win. Good news is I don't have a team I dislike so were guaranteed a win.
I don't think it's food poisoning, I think it's cause you cooked it over burning styrofoam
Last time I was your wingman I had to deal with a girl whose only interest in my body was to clip my toenails. I'm not interested.
If you can't have hot, loud sex in a dorm for the last time ever, what can you do in this world?
Of all the kinds of relationships I've had in my life, I'd have to say, lab-partner-with-benefits takes the fuckin cake
There I was, puking into the toilet, and he was rubbing my feet, buck naked. I feel like a drunk Disney princess.
the police dropped me off. that's how my night went.
Randomize