i was just lookin through my fb pics and i think im with a cat in like 40% of them..: how sad is my life
i an so hammered right now. I'm about to pass out but i just found the lion king dvd and i'm so happy words don't even describe.
I'm gonna name my first kid mufasa regardless if It's a boy or girl
ra ra ra ah ah
wtf?
sexting lady gaga style
Your excuse of not making us Mac and cheese was that you couldn't find 6 cups of water...
kinda considering buying a life alert for sophmore year
the theme of the baby shower is Nightmare On Prego Street
And then you guys went on to show us ur sex positions from the before. Thanks
The liquor store guy just accused me of buying alcohol of minors due to how many bottles I got. The guy should be used to this from me.
I recommend you throw your keys as far as you can in one direction, your phone as far as you can in the opposite direction, and hold on.
I opened my package from my mom today. She put four bottles of tequila in the bottom under my ducky slippers. She knows me way to well.
have i crossed some slutty boundary when gay guys are sending me cock pics?
I have 2 phone numbers written on my vagina. I told you I shouldnt be left to my own devices after tequila shots.
Don't be upset because I bitch slapped you with intelligence
Unexpected pussy is the best kind. Never expected to get any from a stranger at my little brother's bar mitzvah.
Mazeltov!
i passed out in front of ihop...for the second night in a row. i think i need to reevaluate my life choices
Randomize