I was rubbing the clit just like wikipedia told me to.
did you fuck him yet?
hahaha who do you think your talking to.. a nun?
I think I'm going to inject the gummy vitamins with vodka
I'm glad you're using your medical degree for some good for once
I really need to learn how to handle sexual advances from older women
I wish I had your problem
Sunscreen. In my vag. I hate summer sex.
Do 'mystery' cracked ribs heal any quicker than regular ones?
I'm getting very mixed reviews. One friend told me to stop drinking bc the last 3 times he's heard from me I've either peed my pants, been throwing up, or people have been having sex beside me.
Strangely enough I'm encouraging you to keep drinking for all the same reasons.
You can't use the, "think about your future" line when trying to convince me to save some weed for tomorrow.
Well now I have my semen on her headphones
I just asked the bartender if I could get insurance on my drink in case I spilled it.
Id fuck him but only at his house and he had to stay im bed till i left. He only works upper body. It just creeps me out how tiny his legs are
Drunk me spoon fed everyone baby food last night.
Hey... Tell me if you remember differently, but nobody truly saw me naked, right?
At one point I believe I was despencing medical advice while wearing a sombrero and a hulk hand
It was like if the scent of sour milk and burning tires had a baby in taste form.
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