And i generally try not to roofie people when I'm in a committed relationship.
Sitting next to a retarded hot married man on the plane, I got 6.5 hrs to homewreck this shit.
Housing came buy and confiscated our shopping cart :(
she showed up with nothing but olive garden breadsticks in her purse.
did i send you the picture of me smiling with the magnum wrapper?
She kept grabbing my head and told my faces to stop shaking.. Also, she kept whispering something about seeing flowers in my eyes.
Well, I tried to shit into my refrigerator. It was a rough night.
Well we went from the roof to the stairwell to an air mattres. One day were going to fuck in a bed
It was going great until he started saying "ooh kill em" under his breath with each thrust
I wish our county sheriff had a comment section for their mugshots.
But forealz I'm gonna need a solid 52 orgasms so hydrate.
There needs to be a greeting card for "I miss having sex and smoking weed with you."
I blacked out. Broke into their house. Took a shit, and left. This is why you can't leave me unattended.
That time of your life is like a blur to me. There was churches, car fucking, and conservatives
I'm still very high. To be blunt. No pun intended.
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