just so you know, the whole club saw your tits last night. and booed.
what did gay clubs do before lady gaga
Okay I'm all about any plan that ends with "We're gonna get you drunk."
Right now, my father is sitting on the couch, totally smashed, crying, eating pringles, and watching the credits of Transformers 2. Love him.
They had to restock the bar 3 times before midnight. There is a bridesmaid dress hanging in a tree outside.
Idk. I'm naked in front of the computer eating ribs. All is right with the world.
That's so nerdy and hot at the same time.
I'm spoon feeding myself tequila for breakfast, should we skip class today?
So, sleeping with all of my Vicodin in my bra because I knew she'd be searching my room for drugs tonight. I'LL SHOW HER.
I'm sure we could make a ball of yarn and a nickel into a drinking game
Nope. Too much basics going on right now. I'm tying you both up and throwing you to the vibrating sexy toy sharks. You shall either sink or get off gloriously.
Your cock has been in the back of my throat. Co-worker is no longer a sufficient title. Fix that shit ASAP
You don't know the true meaning of fear until your girlfriend's niece insists on sitting on your lap with 20 mg of Viagra coursing through your veins.
There comes a point where there's just condoms and old mcdonalds in your garbage can and you can't tell if you've won or lost.
He's going to be in the air guitar championships in june. Need I say more.
my mom walked in on me eating her out, and i can never kiss my mother again.
Randomize
