It's like God shit irony all over that family
The problem is he wears abercrombie jeans like there's nothing wrong with it
What'd you guys eat?
Literally everything that was frozen.
Someones car got stolen, everyone is yelling, and im drunk just sayin yeah buddy over and over again
Theres a picture of you hanging up on the wall in mcdonalds, i'm impressed
i wasn't going to tell her about the threesome but i had to explain the tree and the green paint everywhere
Jesus once told his disciples that its better to hang out with your best friend than give some douche bag a bj.
And then he tried to clean the throw up off my pants with 409
And to add, there was a fat guy right next to me who, when the girls would shake their butts, he would let out a shrill xena warrior princess cheer
Did u know it's unconstitutional to turn down a shot during 4th of July celebrations.. Rest now dear liver
Pedi-lyte stocked
I just wish he'd leave so I can vomit in peace.
So I should just walk in, look him in the eye and say, "I just came to fuck your brother, nice to meet you" and just walk to your room.
the bartender goes "wow its so good to see you sober" and gives me a hug
just found a picture from last night.
the one of you riding a horse with nothing but a bulletproof vest on?
uhm.... no?...
I woke up wearing nothing but my red thigh high socks and a blue wig. I have no idea what happened.
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