I just caught myself dancing like an old lady in the shower. Have I reached the age where booty dancing stops and swaying of the upper body begins?
dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
I had to fart so bad so i let it go hoping it would be quiet, it was loud and shit came out!!! and i couldnt leave because her parents were behind me
Fuuuuck. Forgot it's October. FYI scarecrows are gonna fuck you up when you're driving high
The black hole just entered the party man, I can literally see guys starting to move towards her.
I'm so sick
I would imagine. You did most of your drinking for brazil last night.
That and I think I got food poisoning from sharing nachos with that homeless guy..
It's pathetic. My bed hasn't been this sexless since it was in bedmart.
Just had the best random sex ever with a girl I picked up from a pro choice rally uptown. God bless the Democratic National Convention.
I told her the only thing I had going for me was my huge cock. She said she was willing to overlook my other shortcomings.
Sending a pic of labia to send to the TN Legislator. Obviously they don't think I know what to do with it so I'm gonna ask them for advice.
He stopped mid-fuck to explain his choice in pillows. HE WAS STILL IN ME!
Remember that time you puked in the middle of wendy's?
Yeah, why?
The staff still remembers me for cleaning it up. Thanks for the free frosty and fries
If I end up in the hospital remind me to order jimmy johns.
Why?
They deliver.
Dude. I just got a visual of u climbing over a bathroom stall to save my life.
My bald co-worker just chugged a literal gallon of coffee. My condolences to his kidneys.
Randomize
