I saw a sign that said worlds largest frying pan next exit. Way to do your fucking part Iowa.
so i saw this homeless guy this morning yelling at a pay phone like chewbacca.
That's what you get for being in filth-adelphia.
so basically i'm the" little sister", he's the "big brother" and we just fucked
well when i got there she was attempting to stick the cat in her mouth.. so maybe you should go check on her
Just got a hand job during Charlie St.cloud I honestly never thought Id thank Zac Efron fir one of his movies but thank you
Do you think it'd be inappropriate to have an I'm Not Keeping My Baby Party the day after her baby shower?
I been sleeping but occasionally wake up feeling like tiny elves are in my throat ripping my esophagus to shreds with their bare hands.
Somehow, you made that sound extremely magical and not at all painful.
You don't understand. This could be the last time I shave a star into my vag. Get over here.
Girl, that was the lost night of 2012 for me and I have buried that night deep deep away..
You're lucky I'm tired or I'd take a pic of me mounting a reindeer yard decoration
Pretty sure I just puked up sand. And nothing else.
The problem with drugs is that there's none in this hotel
The problem with drugs is that showing my boobs only gets so much of them
theres a girl in the library eating whip cream out of a starbucks cup... only whip cream, im way to high for this shit
I think I fell asleep on my pizza last night. Damn, I am sauccccy.
Shame - the story of my life.
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