The elaphant ear plant popped a new leaf ! Wahoo !
Can I ask u a weird question?
Sure
do u have the hershy squirts too?
He snuck into some random hotel's continental breakfast at 3 AM and then passed out on a bench in the lobby. When the cops found him they made him empty out his pockets. No phone, no ID just muffins.
how does a 20 year old who hasnt gone through puberty yet score the game winning goal? fuck sidney crosby and his small nuts.
you took him to the bathroom with you to pee and told him he had to hold your hand..but he couldn't turn on the lights because you didnt want him to hear you peeing..and still got laid. i wish i had your life.
Are we responsible for the snowmen doing it doggy-style in my front yard?
We were laying in the basement dry humping to the rhythm of the washing machine
I will miss his soup and his dick the most
Of all the shitty people we associated with, you should be happy that I'm the one fucking your cousin. Sorry.
Letting two friends screw at my place in exchange for weed. This is my life.
I confess. I just downed the bottle of saki. And I'm singing phantom of the opera to the dogs. Be glad you're not here for the high notes.
We got way too high so we're sitting in the parking lot of the movies trying to figure out what bar to go to
Like, when both of your dads are drag queens you're bound to have some amazing Halloween makeup
ugh i want to get waxed but I’m afraid. my vagina has had enough trauma this week, i don’t know if I can put her thru any more.
May I make reservations with your penis for this evening?
Randomize