This just in: Jon Gosselin's address-The Alexandra. I bet if we showed up he'd date us.
He probably put up nude pics. He seems like that kind of guy.
I got really high with eric & scott.. they're discussing why words sound the way they do.. it's going to get messy
He blew a load on his roommates pillow just to piss him off. Why did you introduce me to these people?
Apparently, his doctor was impressed with how well we took care of his leg. We're like the kings of naked triage.
judging from the number of limes and box of kosher salt on the counter therell be 8.5 gallons of tequila drunk this weekend.
sounds about right
Totally uneven. One tiny pussy lip that almost didn't exist and one giant lip that unfurled liked 5 different times half way down her leg and could have been used to hoist the mainsail on a pirate ship.
Whenever you get off. By "pick me up from work" I mean, "pick me up from a bar by work at your earliest convenience" :)
I'm like 80% sure we nearly got arrested because we threw fireworks at a car
Should I be concerned you put your last name in my phone as "danger"?
I don't know if should be sitting on a toilet or kneeling in front of it
You had 10 drinks. On a first date.
I just masterbated then started bawling.
30 year old woman with braces and crocs came into the store today with her boyfriend. what am I doing wrong.
I just had to explain why I ate a whole quart of mac and cheese before 8am. Not a good start to the day
I can feel the shame as I walk down your hallway.. good night
I'm naked, eating straight Nutella, and listening to "Make you feel my love" on repeat. So no. He didn't ask me out.
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