Used tampon in my purse. That from you?
we were hanging out in his room and he decided to play WoW.. so i took off all my clothes while he wasn't paying attention and laid on his bed and started playing with myself.
did he notice?
of course he didn't notice.. he was playing a fiesty level 1 fucker that wouldn't give up..
At one point I was double fisting both beer & ice cream. I love public events in this town.
Well today was Thanksgiving Anti-Miracle Daydrinkathon so I had to be drunk by 2pm
If you're still on campus there's a jack and coke in the bathroom of fondren science Bldg. Too strong to bring to class.
I have bruises on my ass from her spurs. God bless Texas.
Who topped off the "random beer mix" beer bong with a pinch of pepper?? All you could taste was busch and pepper...
Like I had no idea he knew how to play girls the way he played me. His major is chemistry for christ's sake.
Why the fuck did I wake up in a chair with mouth clamps?!
Cops are just so fun an beautifuk
So you're mad that you saw a penis at a swinger's party? That's rational
My night ended with a French cab driver offering me his sperm free of cost.
I may or may not have just let Ash Ketchum capture my wild Pikachu in a parking lot.
go for it girl, the world is ur dick oyster
It's fucking 2020, I should be able to watch Netflix in the buff while making brownies without you getting preachy about it.
Randomize
