Hehe I wanna Australian kiss.. Its like a French kiss but down under ;)
i miss you so much
i miss you too
oops, did i send that to you? i meant to send it to the money you owe me
i wish mother nature was an actual person cause i'd bitch slap her for sure
sitting in class between the roommates of the two girls i fucked over break. this feels like a bad version of wife swap
I reached in my backpack to pull out my laptop. I found my bottle of Jack and 2 bottles of Coke. It's going to be a good class.
I opened my door to go to class and all there was was a raccoon puking on the doorstep. In hindsight, it was a very accurate omen.
I dare you try and top an Eiffel tower full of Margarita
Prepare for tons of dick. I mean dick by the bucket loads. Waterfalls if cock.
I was trying to climb into what I thought was a bunk bed.. Turns out it was just a cabinet under the sink in a bathroom
Did I run away from you last night?
Yeah it was a great moment for our friendship
Prop 8 repealed and I FINALLY got my period. Good day for America!!!
How about we just fuck in random places all around campus, and skip the boring relationship part?
It's the third day of class and I got told I smell like a distillery.
When I woke up this morning I swear my mouth tasted like dick and rolaids.
While she was pissing on the neighbors shrubs, they threatened to call the cops...she mumbled 'don't threaten me with a good time", so to answer your question, yes she was drunk.
Randomize
