Funniest shit happened at the grocery store. This kid kept asking his mom for candy over and over and she told him 'daddy said no' and he screamed 'he isn't my dad' so loud everyone in the store was silent it was awesome.
he left me a note this morning. it said "thank you for letting me touch you"
Still in Rome. Hooked up with frat boy from SoCal that's studying abroad. He said he was 1/8 italian. I'll take it.
Can we just discuss how hundreds of miles away we were both beyond drunk and in some boys bed. That is the definition of friendship.
Cute boy and deffffff wearing a HS shirt. I am getting too old to be inaccurate.
I just had a mental image of us riding a tractor through hell with one of those big guns mounted on top of it shooting at everyone while the indiana jones music plays.
I'm dressed as a caveman and drunk so that's not really an option
Apparently I filled my purse with chicken nuggets and told my mom I was a "sexual squirrel."
Well, I can now cross "dirty drunk homeless hobo" off of my bucket list of people who have been successful wingmen for me. North Carolina is getting weird.
He has no idea he’s my boyfriend.
You're a disaster
Wanna date?
I’m at that point in my trip where I’m kinda hot, kinda cold and I have to remember to breathe.
I'm going to blackout. I realize this
So um... You probably shouldn't post that picture of me and your crotch just because that's a new level of raunchiness that I'm not willing to accept yet
Want to meet at a cool spot and just park like cops side-by-side and you can eat some potatoes and I can smoke a cigarette in your face?
Randomize