I've done 29 out of the 30 things to do to a naked man according to Cosmo. I don't know if that makes me innovative or slutty.
Genius.
i broke up with my boyfriend last night because i had to eat a freezy pop in every color and he ate the last blue one. i sat on the floor and cried for an hour at least. everyone left. so i decided that this whole weed thing isnt really healthy for my relationships.
i havent thrown up in four monthes, im clearly not drinking enough
I didn't realize he wasn't circumcised... it looked like the Unibomber...
Do you understand how much easier life would be if fannypacks were normal
There's a litter of kittens in my bathtub and beer cans everywhere. I want my apartment key back.
I'll call you tomorrow. I'm ok and back i love you goodnight.
I stole a bike. Here's a pic
Why is everyone else growing up when I'm just crying, eating, and having pregnancy scares?
In either case, seeing now as it's basically two couples, unless we're planning to have a good old fashion orgy I think this isn't going to work out so well.
First encounter with a mirco peen. I was confused when he said he doesnt go down on girls. Cmon dude, practice on a peach.
of fours songebofy did dknt stop believing
how legible are my texts
On the bright side, only one more day until we aren't sober anymore.
we didn't even throw knives this time! it was just the carrot peeler
I made it out of the house. Success.
It's not better out here. I'm at Target hyperventilating in the aisles.
Unexpected pro of the hostel though: literally down the street from Coors Field. I could literally fart on the building in five minutes.
Randomize
