Dude I gave him a bj because he was upset about the NFL draft, if that doesn't lock it down, i don't know what does
im going to live freely with my legs opened and my heart closed
that's almost as bad as that time i almost ashed in a baby carriage
How do the people at CVS not know your living in their bathroom?
someone was throwing condoms at us.
no, they just magically show up around you.
You insisted I take photos of you vomiting off the top of the tree.
My econ prof just gave me a shot glass because I was the "randomly picked" winner of the lecture. Ties into our supply and demand lecture, supplied with a shot glass, demand a thirsty thursday
Just had lapdance from stripper that had her 5th kid 28 hours earlier. A for work ethic.
Just had a heart to heart with my John Belushi poster.
I vote for a trading skills night. You teach me to juggle, I'll teach you knife fighting, and we'll both learn banjo
& I just realized there is no vomit smiley. There needs to be a vomit smiley
Well sort of got busted by a cop while having sex outside, so your call
She picked me up from the bar in her underwear.
I just masturbated to the thought of him straight up talking to me. to us having a conversation. What the hell.
This drunk girl kept yelling for water so I dipped a cup in the toilet and gave it to her. She was thanking me all night.
Randomize
