Jack off faster Americas best dance crew is beyonce themed
you kept yelling at her to "show me your genitals" until the bouncers told us to leave...at which point you showed them YOUR genitals...
please don't ever take me to a strip club again...
Doing "bucket stands" with buckets of margarita. Don't tell me it's not a good idea.
I'm sorry, but the way we fuck, they don't make condoms strong enough not to break
He wore a Medeval Times crown while I gave him a BJ
I just want to make mistakes. Like stds that go away with antibiotics mistakes.
Rule #127: If your going to try fuck a married guy, you gotta be hotter then his wife; diet starts today.
She's like a connoisseur of porn. Her collection has things in it I never even knew existed. She even has an Italian batman porno. Where has she been all my life?
too late I already started a fight with someone named luscious
So we came to a decision, you need to fuck your hot roommate and send us pictures. We voted, so don't hate the democracy this great country stands for
I just want to be like i dont know you but ive seen your penis & i like it
I had to write an apology letter to my roomate for hotboxing in our bathroom. What a bitch.
man my uterus needs to drop the egg or GTFO, BUUUSHIT
Sorry for yelling at you, I'm just really emotional about missing comicon.
He's perfect in every other way. Is buying him a cockring too forward or just honest?
Randomize
