why is it that everyone in pennsylvannia gets fucking prego??
I'm drinking while I write this paper. When I can't see the screen anymore I'm gonna come out
so im decorating easter eggs with my family and my mom is writing "Jesus is risen" and "God loves you!" on the eggs. i wrote things like "I'm naked!" and "there are drugs in these eggs!" on mine.
Xanax and allergy medicine look a lot alike when you spill them on the floor. Just saying that I still have allergies but I'm unsure if I still have legs
The new google images is a smorgasbord of porn now are plans for tonight are off.
just letting you know that jen either: wasn't feeling well and ate grass to make herself throw up or threw up because she's stupid and ate grass
Dear America, sometimes I miss your Everclear and its consequences.
Is it frowned upon to puke at Keeneland while you're betting on horses or is it just whatev
He's way too stoned. I took him to el bra and he's laying on the table, not sure what to do with him
I can feel my teeth in 4 dimensions. I shouldnt be this high at 8 in the morning.
I have experienced an excessively hairy ballsack in my mouth...and it was horrifying. I keep feeling it in my mouth now. It's like hairy ball PTSD.
Is it tacky to frame a negative pregnancy test?
I just found your shirt hanging in a tree 4 blocks from the party...in the opposite direction of your house. where are you going?
Do you know anything about how the saran wrap ended up on my toilet seat?
I just volunteered myself to get tazed this should get interesting
Randomize