dude why did you let me call her?!
i told you it was a bad idea and to quote you exactly, you said "no, it's a good idea..that's what people do when they love each other." you met her 15 minutes prior to that conversation...
you dont publicly announce someones alcholism over facebook. you dont out someone like that.
i don't know how the hand towel got involved, but i peed all over it
yeah except there is a correlation between drinking moonshine and going blind, which kind of concerns me
I shouldn't have to say "get your balls off my counter" on a Wednesday.
Way to ruin everything
I am drinking jager with a cat, your argument is invalid
Is it weird to say that Kobe reminds me of a wise brontosaurus?
I'm FaceTiming Pizza Hut.
first time i ever mailed panties back to a fuck buddy. what better of a way to say its over
Says the girl who left her friends to go have phone sex in the bathroom at Michael's
must go to store soon wiping with panty liner ugh
Of two things I'm absolutely sure: 1. I only took 2 hits off that joint and 2. I definitely ran over hedwig on the way home
we had to follow your trail of clothes to find you.......
HE’S PUKING UP BLOOD
okay all good I mistook strawberita for blood...
I know... It's stupid... It's like, I have sex with his brother and bestfriend ONE time....
Randomize
