He said if I blew him first he'd last longer....if 3 minutes is lasting longer, I'm not sure the bj was worth it
He's married, but his wife isn't my neighbor so I don't feel bad about coveting him.
I love how its suddenly "not all about sex" now that he can't get it up
Um, I don't really remember much about the event... and then I woke up on the metro..
I'm eating lunch next to a table of beautiful culturally-diverse women chattering away happily. It's like sitting next to a Yaz commercial.
you just used a box of cheese-its to get into the bar
its so hard to text. the buttons are tickling my fingers
I kept reassuring him that I was easy like Sunday morning, not easy like "I've had 6 shots of tequila and haven't had sex in three months"
Also I think he would slowly, painfully, die. You really can't live without a penis. You'd explode.
I'd rather just be alone, than deal with this bullshit. I just want to be alone. Cats and vibrators never let you down.
New drink: empty coke can vodka water maple syrup. Get on my level
His mom finally got over her shame and smoked a bowl with us. Merry Christmas to all aka me.
If I send you a picture of a dick will you give me your honest reaction?
He didn't have much of a personality. But I had like 100 orgasms, so that's cool.
Puke-y regrets or just things-seem-far-away regrets?
Randomize
