I hate bills.
Like ones you have to pay or people named William?
we just ha sex. he lasted two minutes. i told him to leave because i had class
isnt today saturday?
They had miseltoe over the keg.... thats cheating
Accidentally spilled a drink on her roommates skirt, offered to clean it, and got a blowjob out of the deal. Something went horribly right.
May have caused an international incident. More details after we taxi in.
They wear helmets and mouth pieces when they drink...u down?
I don't mean to complain but you could have done a better job of keeping me alive last night
The sense of comroderie I've built with my liver over the course of this semester is beautiful
bro i dont care how hot she was, you try keeping it up with the amount of puppet he had in her room, it was like fucking in jeff dunham's house
You went to the animal party as a hoodrat. You won the most creative costume contest.
Also bring a pizza or no entry to my vagina OR the fort.
Cheese only
I just sneezed glitter I JUST SNEEZED G LITTER I j u st SneeZED GLIT TER I DO NOT HAVE TIME FOR THIS AT ALL.
If I'm going to keep blacking out this much I need to start taking more pictures.
He and I tag each other in memes all day. You could say it's getting pretty serious.
I’ve lost count of how many disciplines of science this conversation about Harry Potter has gone through.
Randomize
