i just saw someone i know on True Life. i need new friends.
I actually had no interest in him until he started talking about his 4 arrests. That made him go from a 5 1/2 to a 8, easily.
Would it be cruel if i sold xanax instead of adderall to freshman unfamiliar to the drug-taking profession?
Got robbed by knifepoint. Then got sympathy Bj. I might have to walk down Austin ave drunk every weekend
There is a 5-year old here fighting 'drunk monkeys'. He tried to knock a drink out of my hand with a plastic light saber...
I sucked his dick by a creek, how romantic.
We were so amazed while watching mission impossible ghost protocol last night we didn't even have sex
you are singlehandedly the most cursed object the universe ever conceived
So much for no-infidelity-fridays....
That's good to know, because I will be doing terrible things to you. Terrible things, John, wicked, evil, maniacal things shall happen to you and I will have the audacity to call it sex
STILL COMPLETELY OKAY WITH THIS
please come back. it's turned into strip rock paper scissors
I was simply suggesting that you really should try coke bondage sex.
All I fucking want right now is a cheeseburger the size of my face
Yup we found her. The bouncer was carrying her out
Its pretty bad when you can tell twins apart by the size of their penises...
Randomize
