just to let you know I saw you texting some Kim chick, and facebook saying she's ugly... good job you're gay now
I woke up and she had breakfast in bed for me
RUN RUN RUN RUN
bang him and never speak to him again. also, queef in his face.
i dont this its possible to queef on command.
you can add "aspirated seaman" to the list of things your sister has been admitted to the hospital for
when i came out to my mom, it was over brunch. i was eating a banana. not exactly my smartest breakfast choice.
I feel I need to conquer him. He's six ft eight and 265lbs. Its like the mount Everest of sex.
Are you really this nice or are you just trying to get in my pants?
Both?
Just helped a homeless man panhandle outside of Wawa, made him $6.31. Where are you?
I did too many shots and now a kitten is trying to eat my bagel.
I'm a gay man planning my brothers bachelor party, and he choose someone else to be his best man. I hope they like appltinis and gay clubs. Bastard.
You're an asshole. I don't want your dick as my background. I'll look like I have a thumb fetish.
Lack of response to this text gains you a half hour of freedom before I initiate operations to conclude you are not, in fact, comatose. You requested no mercy.
Lesson learned. No more vodka and toaster strudel
In 18 months of being married we've had sex with 7 different couples. Who said you can't have your cake and eat it.
you told me you wanted to be a soccer mom with a high tolerance then you put the bottle to your face
Randomize
