But, I don't have the body of a porn star, so nobody would hire me. Unless they're doing like a trip to the safari and they need an albino rhino
dude you have to find out what a girl's name is before you sleep with her. if her name is debbie she's boring, if her name is lauren she's an overrated hoebag, if her name is meagan she gived bad head.
Even DaVinci knew it was gay to draw the penis big. Thanks art history
It's not weird mascara. I just have puke crusted on my eyelashes.
watching "look who's talking now." getting choked up at the end when they find each other at the cabin
doesn't that movie star kirstie alley and have talking dogs in it? new low...even for you
Please tell me you saw the asian lady with the medical mask on cutting her lawn with scissors.
Hmd? did you really just created an abbrievation for hold my dick?
Oh my god I'm so bored. The virgin is so disinteresting when I'm not trying to cum on her face.
All I I know is that there's 2 new contacts in my phone. Drunk Backdoor and Gayass Handshake. Thanks, Jameson.
So the night ended when we tried making fireworks out of gunpowder and oregano. You can figure out how that went.
He's asking if he can send a dick pic. How do I politely decline that?
Update - might be back in your neighbor's good graces. She liked the framed photo I gave her of me on the tractor with my business out.
Ended up at the strip club, got told I should be a dancer 4 times, got free tacos and my hot TA slide in the dms. How was your night?
I added our drug dealer to the quickbooks software babe, he is listed under vendor's as an expense category... money management is such a bitch...
How's work going?
Boring. I have a cat on a leash right now
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