six shots in, he is hammered and doing stretches before each shot
I think I might.. possibly.. like a Justin Bieber song.
I think you might... possibly... have sprouted a vagina.
i dunno what you eat but your cum is all over my underwear and it smells like pretzels
You know who really doesn't like surpise in-your-face air guitar solos? Strangers.
Of course I'm hard in the pics. If there's a chance that these pictures will cause a scandal later in my life I at least want my dick to look it's biggest
i just complicated the hell out of my summer by fucking him this early on
It's hard to take you serious when you're crying your eyes out wearing an adult sized onesie.
I just took two shots of Burnerts out of a ladle. Get here now.
This morning I found four opened yet full beers on my desk and my towel rack pulled off the wall and in bed with me
You gotta own your makeout pics Matt. They're like badges of honor
Omg i got really stoned and used a makeup app on my grandma...well, I’m definitely not adopted
if I dont text you back in 10min assume i am in fact still dizzy and injured myself in the shower. and call an ambulance. thanx.
Nope. Im a prince of the americas. I treat my women like future queens. Also, im drunk watching the royal wedding
Ps can u get with my cousin? He's a freshman at uconn and he's very attractive but like were related....
Imagine we only get one cock for the rest of your life. I’d pick his dick. That good!
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