chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.
I found a girl on our couch wearing lederhosen this mornig... I dont know if i should be impressed or ashamed
Ricky Martin is gay. You owe me $10 from 3rd grade.
Nothing makes my dick softer than hot girls in rain boots.
It was the worst sex ever. All she did was tap on my balls with her hands like she was in a reggae band.
sitting in my room in a shopping cart. they couldnt get my legs out of the holes. i want breakfast.
Hey so I just want to get straight to the point it was me who ate the last cupcake and it was your sister who I fucked last nigt
I just baptized the girl next to me. LONG LIVE THE CHURCH OF VODKA
He's a doctor now.. hope he can cure his small dick
did you just try to prove your straightness by quoting a lady gaga song?
On another note I am sitting in my bed naked, buzzed, and working on a notecard for my 8:00am test tomorrow. I think I need to make better choices.
My vape juice got mixed up with the astroglide.
Wow..I bet that tasted bad.
Not tasted.
Curing hangovers with more alcohol was a great idea for the first five days
I have a video on my phone of someone streaking in my house last night, do you have any idea who it is?
the fact that your 21st birthday is also new years eve is pretty much a death sentence
Randomize
