He's getting better. i'm using GuitarHero to teach him how to finger me. My clit = the red tab.
remind me to tell you about the ham sandwich empire im building
Anything that's based on a blow job I'm in favor of.
she said, and i quote, "i want to black out with my rack out"
Its weird to pet your cat with a boner
What the fuck?
We can talk tomorrow when we're both alert. My mind is somewhere else right now.
Where's it at?
In your pants.
The only reason we got away with streaking last time was cuz we had those miner hats
We were naked in bed for hours and we didn't have sex. Either he's gay or he wants to respect me. Neither of which I approve of.
They fucked on my pong table last St. Patty's and broke it. I feel like I should be hiding my new one. Would hate for a tradition to form.
I actually took a sword out of your hands. You were samurai slashing lemons to make chasers.
HOLY FUCK I JUST GOT WOKEN UP BY THUNDER!!!!!
I THINK I SHARTED
I feel like shit, and I can't get the band aids off my nipples.
Sooo, did you delete me cause I said I wouldn't babysit you while you did shrooms? You're a grown man.
if i drink i'll go into liver failure but ok
totally worth it, dude its $1 pbr
Whatever he got a sick blow job and his high school fantasy was fulfilled
And that's what dreams are made of
*hilary duff crying in the background*
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