Currently having a discussion about how bad cheating is with the girl im dating and the girl im fucking. This might be a sign that i need to reassess my life
he just put it in my mouth and said "go"
i think she is mad at you for trying to take a shit in the back seat of her car
I didn't even realize you were getting that drunk until bam!
is bam when I fell down the stairs or when I threw up standing at the bar?
my favorite part of the night was when I was in the bathroom frantically trying to get my cat whiskers and nose off to make hooking up less awkward
It's 4th of July all over again, we were chasing with the pool water.
If he really loved his girlfriend then he'd wear a condom when he fucks me.
Is it bad of me to apply as a night shift counselor at a boys orphanage purely because of how laid that would get me at bars?
Oh god. It's like a broken faucet. My guts sound like a bilge pump clogged with golf balls and cake frosting.
This is the third time that ive slept with him. He bought me more milk. I can feel the romance growing.
he was inside of, then got up said "we don't want you having a baby," grabbed his car keys and left. so now i'm just sitting on his bed, wondering if he's coming back.
I feel like as your wife, as cool with your decision-making skills as I usually am, there should be a bigger explanation to you adopting a child while I'm in Houston.
I never thought I would have to get vodka suctioned out of my ear
wanna come over? I have movies.
sure, what movies
porn or disney, your choice
She's too awesome to dump: she gives me great blow jobs and free Popeyes. You just don't burn a bridge like that.
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